Hey there
What’s that in your sky?
With all the pretty lights
You think I can get that high?
-opening lyrics, Until I Die, Brandi Carlile (The Story)
I’ve been cooped up inside the house for weeks now. It’s a few days short of a month. Sure, I get to go out when I have to pay my bills or to run to a nearby 7-11 to replenish my stock of coffee—some of my dues I even paid late because I’ve been so swamped with work that I can’t even take half an hour away from my “workstation” during the 9-5 banking hours. It sounds crazy and a bit ridiculous, but that’s how it is. I shouldn’t really be sounding like I’m complaining because I brought this all to myself. I took on more jobs than I can handle, again, and for what? Frankly, to have insurance; to keep back-ups; to feel busy, and by consequence, feel secure in this unpredictable world of freelancing. In the end, I must admit doing things this way is neither profitable nor skill honing.
Forgive a novice freelancer her rants and forgive my bipolarity, because even before I get to finish this post and hit “Publish,” something came in my inbox that made me smile and summarily washed away my current doubts, if not my weariness. I expected to go through phases when I left my job to go solo. Even that phase when I know I’ll feel so alone and—there’s no other word for it—sad.
The good news is, I think I finally have room to breathe and time to re-assess how I handle my scheduling. This weekend I’ll go out to see what the outside world has been up to. These are the times I wish I drive, even with cheap auto insurance, so I can cover more ground comfortably. But then again, what use is a car if I don’t have time to go out and actually drive around?
Rather timely, I came across this article about giving up tenure for happiness. As with everything else in this world, it’s not for everyone. But whatever rocks your boat, as they say. And mine? I’m not sure yet, but I’m not sweating it anymore. Let’s just say it can be tiring to ask the universe a lot of questions. I’m not waiting for visions now or anything; I’m just trying not to take myself too seriously. Believe me, that has been a struggle. So, for now, I won’t wonder how I’m going to live my life in the next ten years going forward. I’ll just worry about how I’ll get to the mall this Sunday. Because I could really use some window shopping or maybe even a movie inside an actual moviehouse.
Oy, not my family drama! I tend to stay away from those. But I found this new title from a newsletter sent by Barnes & Noble, and I think this will be the subject of my next book hunt.
Now, an Amazon reviewer who gave the book five stars warned that this is not a book for those who want action and exciting, fast-paced storytelling in their reading materials; this is more ”for quiet reflection,” which is more my kind of book, actually.
A million-plus-copy best seller in Korea—a magnificent English-language debut poised to become an international sensation—this is the stunning, deeply moving story of a family’s search for their mother, who goes missing one afternoon amid the crowds of the Seoul Station subway.
Told through the piercing voices and urgent perspectives of a daughter, son, husband, and mother, Please Look After Mom is at once an authentic picture of contemporary life in Korea and a universal story of family love.
You will never think of your mother the same way again after you read this book.
As I always do when I encounter potential good reads, I Googled reviews, and most have been good except for one by an American reviewer who can’t seem to relate to the nature of Asian family relationships. She hated the fact that the characters in the book have to feel so guilty about how they deal with, or dealt with, each other: it’s against the American ideal, she says, of being independent and taking responsibility for yourself. Obviously that wouldn’t be a problem for me, as I am all too familiar with the concept of close family ties, so I’m giving this book a go. The first book I ordered just have to arrive first and I have to finish that one, too. This is not among the Exclusive products of the site, so I guess in a few months I might be able to find a copy in local bookstores.
I’ve been spending a considerable amount of my time lately thinking about a beach destination, especially with all these deal sites offering discounts on popular resorts and hotels across the country. I most certainly would like to see El Nido, and that seemed like an impossible dream before because I’ve been hearing about how expensive it is to go there, but now options are available for cheaper travel and accommodations. Although I’m still a bit scared about the 7-hour travel by land (on a “ragged, winding road”; I’m also feeling weary just thinking about the loooooong ride) from Puerto Prinsesa to El Nido—and that seems to be the most feasible option because the other one is a chartered plane ride directly to El Nido, which according to one site costs Php13,000+ and I’m not even sure if that’s two-way!—I will still brave it if only I can gather at least six friends to come with me. Now, that is an even more daunting task. A few more courage and a little more daring, and I’ll be ready to join strangers with name tags on a tour like that, if I can find such groups. I know “to travel alone, at least once” is something that quite a number of people have in their things-to-do-before-i-die lists, and it’s also in mine. How exciting would it be if I can finally write about doing it, rather than thinking about it? I’m guessing that’ll call for a big, huge, enormous YAY!
I found this gem from retweets somewhere in my Twitter stream. This video has gone viral, with almost 3 millon views now, and for good reason: it is inspiring, at least for those who can take the message the right way (or at least the way I think the author intended).
An excerpt:
Society is afraid of alonedom, like lonely hearts are wasting away in basements, like people must have problems if, after a while, nobody is dating them. but lonely is a freedom that breaths easy and weightless and lonely is healing if you make it.
If you make it. That’s quite powerful. Because this is a kind of message that people will most certainly say “But…(bah blah)” to. Like they say, nobody wants to be alone. But ever? Even for some measure of time? Think about it, if you choose being with people—any people: people you don’t really like, bad people, people who push you down, or those who make you crazy—just because you fear going solo.
I believe that you’ll be a better company to others if you embrace yourself fully first. If you can be alone and not feel so empty, then you have so much more to share when you have to be with others. But then again you can always just take what others have to share, if that’s your style, or constantly search for others who are the same. Isn’t this the reason why friendships and relationships form and/or get broken all the time, anyway? And then there may be others who never had to face the prospect of being alone, and who’s to say they are missing anything? But for those who knows how to be alone, and is surviving it, cherishing it, or using it to live life in the best possible way regardless, you have my admiration. Not everyone is up for it.
When we visited Universal Studios Singapore, I was having a bad day because of some stuff going on in my psyche compounded by a physiological nuisance that just couldn’t wait until I get back home to Manila. To be honest, I didn’t enjoy much of the day, especially because I never really liked amusement parks or any of their rides. But I did want to see what’s in there—because it’s Universal freaking Studios—so I had no problem shelling out almost 75 SGD (about 2500 PhP) for a day pass. So yeah. At least I loved the fireworks show, which served to cap our day.
If I ever get to Orlando, Florida, I’m not sure if I’d have much interest to see their Universal Studios. My sister said that the one in Los Angeles is pretty much the same. But Kelly Clarkson performed in Orlando last week, as a part of The Ellen Show. If there are any shows like that playing, then it might get my attention. Speaking of KC, I just love her neck accessory here (photo courtesy of the Internet).
See? I wanted to buy something like that in Singapore but I hesitated spending 35 SGD (>1000 PhP) for something I’ll probably won’t have much occassion to wear. But holy necklace mother! I’m envious now.
Here’s the video of the complete performance where she sang a medley of her biggest hits.
