No matter what we do, there’s always that invisible line that limits our choices. That’s normal. That’s human. And I’d say that it’s rational to have limits because otherwise, can you imagine the chaos that would ensue? Lately, though, I’m being confronted with contradicting thoughts about what to aim for in life. Of course, people have different aspirations and priorities. These personal inclinations are what set the tone for the life plan that we set for ourselves.
Now, here is how I look at it: You have potential. To be great, to be good, to be satisfied, or simply to be happy with whatever comes along. It goes without saying that you also have potential to suck. But that’s not exactly a fork in the road that we’ll look at. I can’t tell you why some people are more successful than others, and I certainly cannot say why others are (or seem to be) happier despite not really aiming for anything. But I can tell you that looking into your strengths making use of them will give you dividends. Don’t sue me if doing so won’t give you money, though I honestly believe that realizing some of your dreams will give you a proportional amount of happiness.
I guess what I’m saying is that if you really want something, at least try to get it. But believe that you will, while facing the fear of disappointment. Personally, I tend to expect the worse, so I can shrug off disappointments probably a little better than some. But that’s also a product of a lifetime of processing emotions and thoughts a little too intensely, so that’s probably not the norm.
Believe it or not, I’m not trying to be inspirational. I’m just trying to get across the point that despite our plain realities, there’s always that tiniest bit of anomaly that can make things different for the better. So don’t be afraid to take risks, within reason. Stick to your guns, despite doubts from others. Better yet, work in the background so you won’t have to worry about being embarrassed if things don’t pan out. Of course, expect that it would also take much work, and not to mention eye cream to mask your lack of sleep, to go beyond your limits. If it’s really worth it, I’d say go for broke at least once in your life. At least you’ll have the satisfaction of knowing that you tried.
Remember my last post about getting old? Don’t worry, I’m not expecting that you do.
Anyway, another thing that makes me feel ancient is the fact that I’ve started to buy age spot removal creams. I was actually looking for a facial moisturizer when I saw this day cream/night cream combo that’s supposed to make you look “youthful” and fight the signs of aging. Heck, they even have facial wash, toner, and everything of the sort. I thought to myself, Why the heck not? It’s not like I believe my skin don’t need that right now.
So much easier if there’s a fountain of youth and we’ll just drink from it. Now I’m going to have nightmares of Michelle Pfeiffer as that evil witch in Stardust.
I used to be so against multitasking. I believed that pouring all your attention to one particular thing at a time is the best way to work around tasks. Until I actually begun to juggle a lot of things at once, and realized that it is sometimes more productive that way. I even gave up my TV and DVD player, not quite literally though. Case in point, while I’m now typing this blog post, I’m also constantly checking my French Open live streaming window, watching Justine Henin’s match and through all those insurance advertising commercials. I also just accepted a friend request on my Facebook page and is in the process of answering some e-mails, as well. Well, these are just the things I do on my laptop. I can work around the house to finish some chores while I’m at it as well. The verdict for now: multitasking wins.
Sometimes I forget how old I really am. I’m in my (very, if you please) early 30s, if I have to let that out. It’s funny that I’ve always felt like I’m an old soul, but when I really stop and think about what my age means, I still get baffled. I mean, it’s not like I’m thinking about retiring to go and design furniture or something, but when confronted by my not so clear future, I do feel a bit apprehensive. Don’t get me wrong, I think I’m starting to enjoy my life more than ever right now. I have stuff that keeps me busy, occupied, satisfied, and hopeful. It’s just the uncertainty of it all that gets to me sometimes. I just remind myself that nothing is certain in this world anyway. Like Miley Cyrus sings, it’s not about what’s waiting on the other side of the mountain - it’s about the climb.
Find that redundant? Then you are, too. Just kidding. No, really.
I do not take offense when I hear those words apply to me. Though I must admit I only probably heard it said only in my mind before. That make sense? Don’t worry, I’m reasonably lucid (although I actually just woke up); it’s not like I’m smoking cohiba this early or anything. Just that I was laughing at a friend’s Twitter comment, which you can imagine talks about me (or a tweet I made) bordering on being nerdy. I agree, and thought that it couldn’t hurt. This blog would attest to that. At least the first part.
At the risk of having carpal tunnel syndrome, I’m enjoying my cousin’s playstation 3. Long story, my aunt didn’t want it anywhere near her house because the kids there get too distracted by it. So my sister took it home, and as I’ve been trying to download games for her and my brother, I prioritized a video game called Top Spin (tennis) for myself. It’s quite fun. The players and tournaments are a bit outdated, but what I find most fascinating is that you’ll recognize the mannerisms and movements of some of the better-known players being simulated in the game. With my hands being overused from daily computer work and now this, I guess I’ll need to limit myself with playing. I only finish an exhibition game or two for less than 15 minutes each time, anyway.
How important is reputation, anyway? Like they say, you can’t please everybody. So why try to build a reputation at all? Isn’t it always better not to care about what others are thinking and just be yourself? That way, you’ll live freely and, rather not too positive sounding, carelessly. I don’t know. I think there’s a middle ground in this. Although I’m starting to think that my propensity to look for a middle ground in everything is not always a good thing.
Case in point: A friend mentioned that John Mayer was supposed to have a concert here in Manila, although I think that got canceled. He asked me if I’d be watching, and I was shaking my head so forcefully to say no. What I was thinking right then and there was what I’ve read about this musician who I used to appreciate. I loved his music but I can’t stand what has been written about him and what I’ve seen him write - it’s like he’s swallowed a can of testosterone cream and goes around proclaiming he’s Hollywood’s Don Juan. And that’s among other things. So I guess in this case, my personal judgement has won over my appreciation for music, and that’s largely because of the artist’s reputation.
Well, I’m also thinking about the other end of the spectrum - when someone builds a public persona but is totally different when no one is looking. Hypocrisy doesn’t get points either. But who’s counting, anyway? I’m just going to give myself a headache if I’ll dwell too much on this, so I’ll just chill, at least until someone in my life actually affects my own by being one or the other.
I’ve read about web sites - even personal ones - that got bought for millions of bucks, and I can’t help but wonder what can I possibly do to create one that will catch the interest of any party for them to buy it, even for the least possible price? I just thought it would be cool like that. It will be like a validation that you’re doing something right and that all those hours in front of your computer, surfing the world wide web, didn’t go to waste. It’s a long shot for me I guess, but I’ve long since discovered that thinking of the impossible in impossible terms will get you nowhere. It’s not bad to dream. Sometimes they come true, one way or another. Or even if they don’t, you get that fleeting feeling of being happy in your daydreams, so why the hell not?
I’ll be renewing my paid domain soon, and I’ve been reading about merchant account reseller programs in eCommerce. I already know that’s it’s not impossible to earn from writing online. Maybe I should check out other potential ventures as well.
I love angry, sad songs. The stuff Lifehouse, Evanescence, Kelly Clarkson, Alanis Morissette, and heck even Avril Lavigne and Linkin Park dish out. That doesn’t mean I can’t enjoy bubbly, positive, happy songs. Like right now, I’ve just discovered Miley Cyrus’ The Climb, and despite my preconceived notions about the Disney starlet, I really think that’s a great song with a very positive message. Never mind that I discovered that song while following a link to apidexin reviews.
But as I was blasting KC’s My December album on my headphones, as I’ve said in my last post, I can’t help but laugh with this song
It seems every time I find a good man
He’s got a good little wife
I’m not jealous but I won’t lie
I don’t want to hear about your wonderful life
And babies everywhere I look
Trophy wives with their little black books
At this rate I’m gonna end up alone
It’s probably all my fault, all my faultOh, another dead end. Again
Oh, I’m getting tired of believing
Even sicker of pretending
That it’s not so bad, just wait it out
You’d think I should’ve gotten over Kelly Clarkson’s May 1 concert by now, but you’re wrong. I’ve been listening to all her songs every single day and I’m showing no sign of letting up any time soon. That’s considering that I’ve always liked Kelly and thought that she had a great voice, but never thought of myself as a real fan. Well, I guess three posts in a row that’s KC related should qualify me as one now. If only tapping my fingers on the table and my feet on the floor and bobbing my head like an idiot can serve as a fat burner, then I’d say being addicted to her music has health benefits as well.
Right now I’m familiarizing myself with the songs in her third, less successful but nevertheless awesome album, My December. Call me biased but I really think this album’s way underrated. It’s a great sound, although less pop than her usual stuff. I already have quite a few favorite songs.
